Random Thoughts

Nothing terribly exciting... some pics of the airport... and some general scenery...

I'm in a fairly urban area... so... there's more than just nature in the pics

Which OS are You?

So, life is full of uncertainty right now... all of it minor crap... however, enough minor junk to feel like a boatload of manure...

I loved my job a week ago, now I'm not certain if the company will exist in less than a month... my favorite co-worker is quitting before the end of the month... besides him just being cool, I'll lose my free and understanding tech support... Then there's my actual job, six months ago my boss said she was working to get my title changed to Operations Analyst... which would rock... but this week she told me I was a Data Analyst... maybe it's no big deal... but I kind of fooled myself into believing that I was getting somewhere... and now, I feel like I'm where I was at six months ago... other people in the company are taking over stuff I understand... and I'm assigned to the top priority in the company... but it just seems empty... and it's so hard to stay focused when I don't know if any of it is going to matter...

Not to mention Christmas is just around the corner... I'm halfway finished with one person and I have about 8 more people to go... with a ~very~ meager budget... I love the holidays, I'm really looking forward to it this year... for once in a long time... but I really want to give back to alot of people... with almost no funds available... no knowledge of whether this money should be saced and all be damned... or spend it and just be pissed... and not get in trouble... people that I don't even have a need to please are making demands on me because of the situation that I'm in...

I've been looking for Operations Analyst positions, but I'm too dedicated to my current company to apply... and for some, I'm not sure I want to move...

And I'm so tired of counting every last dollar I earn, hoping I've planned well enough to have a few extra bucks to have a good time... and I feel like such a failure when I can't do everything I should be able to...

I have my high school reunion in a year... one of my friend's works for Microsoft... whether you like it or not, I'm sure he's bringing in a nice penny... another friend who's successfully written a 2-dimensional game that is Castlevania style... an ex who seems to be doing well for him... and here I am, feeling like the village idiot, once again... I don't care if other people think I should be competitive or not, I am... deal...

My friends from high school tear me apart... a reminder of what I could be... a reminder of what I went through... and even though they all understand now, I feel so isolated...

It's been years, but once again, I am that deserted island... no one understands, no one knows, I can't communicate, I can't explain what I feel to those I care about because I don't understand, I can't even explain basic comments at work... once again, I am the floating void that some can see and no one can touch...

I miss my puppy and my bison...

So, it's been over ten days since my last post... not that anyone cares...

I've decided I'm mad at the entire world... not that I can take everyone on at once...

Oh and random musings from my trip to Ohio... it was something about Politicians and... something else, bah, I forget...

I'm still massively addicted to Avatar: The Last Airbender... and hoping a Appa stuffed animal will makes it way to my home...

On another round of random thoughts, I heard a quote on a Christian radio station that seems to sum up why we're all screwed... I'll paraphrase since I can't remember the exact quote... the basic jist is that Christians try to make this world, the Earth , their home, when their home is in heaven... knowing the way part of my family is... I think I'm beginning to understand why half the planet doesn't give a crap if they destroy everything on this planet. Who cares? They're just some teenage kid passing through, it's not ~their~ home.

C'mon people, it's great to have your entire being focused on godly matters but you're since in the damned physical plane... try to at least act like you give half a crap what happens here besides having your religion dominate every moral action... leaving the world to exploitation, destruction, and pollution...

Anyway, as I said earlier, I'm in a bad mood...

It's all Star Kitty Justice's fault... so, I just had to know what type of Mythological Creature I should be...

You Are a Mermaid

You are a total daydreamer, and people tend to think you're flakier than you actually are. While your head is often in the clouds, you'll always come back to earth to help someone in need. Beyond being a caring person, you are also very intelligent and rational. You understand the connections of the universe better than almost anyone else.

Now I just need to figure out how to get Flying Bison! :)

Well, I finally have made some progress with my 3D Modelling...

I'll admit, it's nowhere near to the level of perfection I'm looking for, but for my first actual connected pair of legs and torso... it looks great!

I'm so pleased with the progress I have made so far! Next I'll need to add the arms, hands, and head... then do the very detailed face modelling. :-(

I think the next part will be to try putting the armature in and see if I can get a nifty animated dude...

So, I am officially a Proud Psuedo Parent of a very gifted and intelligent Kindergartner!

Just heard the word back from the Parent-Teacher Conference, and the smart lad is performing at or above expectations.... except like all good kids, he likes to play too much...

Ah, he's the greatest...

Work was tiring, and now that I'm home, I have to figure out what to get from the store... yet another thrilling evening!

So, after the second week straight of trying to find nice, simple, handy instructions on creating a human model in Blender... I've lost my mind!!!!!

Assuming, I ever had it to begin with...

Gah, I just want to make one pretty person in Blender, is that too much to ask? Honestly...

Guess I could continue to work through those tutorials I downloaded and do the projects like a good kid, but where's the fun it that? That means I've done everything the right way... or kind of right, I guess, since I'm not planning on getting a major in Graphic Design anytime soon...

I guess after a day of starting at a horrific example of what Microsoft wants to call an accounting system, I deserve to be out of my mind...

Anyway, time to call it quits for yet another and come back to this project tomorrow :-(

So, it's only been about three months since my last post... boy, I am great at these journal things...

I was terrible about them growing up too...

Been working on graphics stuff for 3D Design, it's going alright... aside from the fact that modelling a human seems about 10 times more difficult than I first expected... but see the couch, it turned out alright. :-D

Work is kicking my butt, but I'm still loving it. I got some time away from my desk to get caught up. I don't feel quite so backlogged anymore, but I still have alot to do. And nine days of messed up Bank Reconciliations to get figured out.

Oh well, just another challenge in the joy of life.

So, I had someone recently ask me if I used this thing... not really...

I'm not really sure what to write, but well, here I am, typing something into the void that is the internet, I suppose...

Enjoy and be well all!